Um. I sort of skipped most of September and October. Whoops!

We had some haps goin' on, too!  I guess I need to play catch up.  =)

At the end of September, we visited my in laws in Louisiana.  We spent five days, and Oliver had a great time!  Levi and I even slipped away to visit New Orleans again, and had a great time being together and reconnecting.  Recharging, I guess.  We don't get a lot of alone time these days.

The first weekend in October, we had our annual trip to the pumpkin patch!  We go every year with our friends Stephanie and Robert and their little girl Ada.  This was our second trip.  Last year, we picked the absolute coldest day of the year to go, and had grumpy four and two month old babies.  This year, we picked a gorgeous day, and had happy sixteen and fourteen month old babies!  It was much improved.

Oliver looks super grumpy in a ton of my pictures, but I blame the sunshine.  That, and possibly being a bit confused as to where we were and what all the huge orange things were.  Once we got over to the smaller pumpkins, he yelled, "Ball!!", and had a blast.  We even got a couple of smiles.  =)  Here are some of my favorite shots!

He's not really super grumpy.  It was bright!  This is my fave.  =)

Family pic!

Handsome fella!

"I AM GONNA PICK UP THESE PUMPKINS SO HARD!!"

"DAD I GOT ONE!"

Finally got some smiles!

Baby is doing well.  We have had five appointments so far, and five ultrasounds!  This last one was for our NT test, which normally I would have skipped, but I wanted Levi to get to see another ultrasound.  The one he saw was boring, and then he missed an exciting one, so I wanted him to see what was going on.  We got a great little pic of our little one!

I love the little fist!  Adorable.  We weren't able to tell the gender at this u/s (the tech tried but couldn't get the money shot!), so keep your eyes peeled for that revelation in another seven weeks or so.  =)

Saturday we're having the guys over for Nerd Day.  The fellas get together once a month to play nerdy board games (the ones they can't trick us wives into playing), and it's our turn to host again.  I love having people over!  We live a good thirty minutes to an hour away from all but like, two, of our friends, so no one ever wants to drive all the way out here.  So when folks come, I go all out!  I am making sausage and cheese balls, meatballs, cheesy chicken empanadas, and chicken salad tassie cups.  I tried to make foods the guys could eat with one hand while still playing their game...because the good Lord knows they can't take a lunch break!  I'm not a big baker, so I bought Oatmeal Creme Pies and Nutty Bars for dessert.  Yum!

K.  Bed time.  I'm an old pregnant woman, you know.  Night!

...I'm a little bit terrified.

So, even though we were trying to get pregnant, I have to admit some days?  I'm a little bit terrified.

For several reasons.

First of all, I recall the newborn period very, very well.  I remember feeling like a crazy person because of the hormones.  I remember being tired.  I remember being overwhelmed...which I think was mostly due to having a baby for the first time ever, and not really knowing what we were doing.

Secondly, I am terrified that this baby is a girl.  I know that it sounds horrible, but I have this huge fear that if I have a daughter, she'll end up just like me.  I have never had much confidence...never had much self esteem.  My mom comes from a culture where shame and guilt are prevalent, and I was told my whole life how I'd be so pretty if I just lost weight.  How my mom's friends had such beautiful daughters because they were thin.  I can't blame my mother, because I know this is just the culture she grew up in, but it really runs deep for me.  I don't want to unintentionally instill that in my own hypothetical daughter.

I really think it's mostly the second part that has me so afraid.  I'm afraid that a daughter wouldn't receive everything she needed from me.  And then I feel like a complete failure, even though I don't even HAVE a daughter and I haven't failed her, lol.

I'm being irrational, I know.  My prayer now is that God will give me peace, no matter what the gender of this baby.  Of course I will love a daughter and do the best I can to instill everything my parents did not.  Though I still would love another little boy, I will be just fine if it's a girl.  I wouldn't have been able to say that last week!  Progress.  =)

DRAMA, and baby news

I have been shopping dude date club message boards, and have yet to find one I like.  This is super sad, because I loved my DDC from parents.com the first time around...the only thing I had to overlook were the posts of questions you'd know the answers to if you cracked any pregnancy book ever (or just used google? lol), and this one chick who was kind of crazy.

But I digress.

Parents.com changed their look, and I hate it when a message board doesn't look like a message board.  Call me old.  Fashioned.  Or just old.

I joined up at JustMommies.com, thinking it would be okay, and then this gem popped up on our board about another DDC about circumcision.  Personally, I think circ'ing is a very personal choice, but this post was very inflammatory (the title had something about death in it...come on now!) and someone posted their thoughts about it on our boards.  Well all hades broke loose!  First, it was the first DDC posting about how the second DDC were talking smack about them and judging and what not, and then it was the secondd DDC saying ooooh we need to apologize, should we make a special thread?  Seriously?  People had already apologized.  On several threads.  Also?  They posted this on a PUBLIC forum on the INTERNET.  Are they seriously surprised that someone else read it?

People on one of the boards were talking about how when you're passionate about something, sometimes you come off as rude.  I think that is so silly!  There are many things I am passionate about, especially when it comes to parenting, but I hold my tongue because I know it will only hurt feelings.  For instance, I am a big advocate for using parent directed feeding, which is taught in the book On Becoming Babywise.  Granted, the book is very poorly written (and BW2 is even worse!), the tactics in the book are solid and have worked well for my family.  My son started sleeping from 11pm-7am at 11 weeks, and is now 15 months old, has two 2 hour naps a day, and sleeps 11 hours at night (though I suspect he would sleep longer if we let him!).  Either way, I know that some folks out there consider BW to be super controversial (though mostly I think it's because of misinformation and older versions of the book, but again, I digress), so I don't go around posting topics on message boards about how I think other parenting styles are terrible for babies.  Do I disagree with them?  Sure, but it's your prerogative as a parent to make those choices for your family.

There is a difference between being passionate about something, and being pushy about something.  My motto?  Do your own thing, and let others do theirs.  I understand wanting people to be well read on topics...even controversial ones...but in the end it's not your choice what others do with their babies.

Sorry to rant!  I was really hoping to find a close knit group of women like I had last time...not sure yet if that's what I've found.  Sticking it out to see what comes of it.  There are a couple of ladies that I have semi-connected with.

Had an appointment today...thought we were going to get to hear the heartbeat, but only got to see it on the u/s.  Got another little pic of my punkin, though!  Also got to meet the other doctor at my new practice (the other doc delivered Oliver, so we've met, lol)...he was nice.  Off to bed I go!

Lucky.

A few weeks ago, Levi sent me flowers.  The card said, "I bought you flowers!  -Your Husband"  Sweet, but the card left much to be desired.

For our anniversary, Levi sent me three dozen roses.  They are so pretty!!  This time, the card was much sweeter.  

"You are the love of my life.  Thanks so much for sitcking by me the last seven years.  I pray our foundation of love is mirrored in our children as we raise them to love and serve God.  -Love, Levi"

So sweet!  It's also what I pray...that we will be an example of love for our children, and that they will also love and serve God.


I was wrong about our dinner date.  We went to Scalini's instead!  So. Good.  It's famous for it's Eggplant Parmesan, because it's known to send some women into labor!  If you eat the EP, and you have your baby within 48 hours, they send you an adorable pink or blue Scalini's Baby onesie!  I ate there twice trying to evict Oliver (since he was a week late and I was OVER IT), but it wasn't much help.  I do have a friend who it worked for, though!


After dinner, we wanted to go see a movie, but they all started waaaaay late.  Instead we did a bit of shopping for the kids (I say kids because Oliver needed a new sleep sack, and instead of buying him two, we bought one for him and one for the little one to come!), and headed home.  All in all, a wonderful time.  I'm a lucky lady!!

Seven years!

Today marks seven years of wedded bliss.  =D

Seven years ago today, I married my best friend.  Today is a special day, because there were times where I wasn't sure we'd make it.  Our first year was very hard on us, but every year is sweeter than the last!

I got three dozen roses in the mail today.  They are so pretty!!  I'll post a pic when they have opened up some.  Tonight, we're going to dinner at an undisclosed location (I have an idea, and am hoping we're going to Canoe in Atlanta!), and my sister is sitting for us tonight.  Looking forward to a romantic night out with my beloved!

Love.

Yesterday was the anniversary of my first date with Levi.  Eleven years ago, we met up at his new college digs, had dinner, and went to see Deep Blue Sea.  =D  I fondly remember him NOT holding my hand and shushing me during the movie!  lol  It was an awkward sort of date, because we had been friends for so long, but we had a nice time.

Monday is our seventh wedding anniversary.  I accidentally saw on the bank statement online that he ordered me flowers (for the second time this month!), even though I totally told him never to do so again because it costs so much, and grocery store flowers?  Still pretty.  We're planning on going out to dinner somewhere.  Levi is planning it, and I'm going to be surprised.  Romantic, no?  =)

Things on the baby front are fine, though I don't remember this much round ligament pain this early on.  At least I think that's what it is...or at least it's what the OB called it.  All I want to do is eat (and it's hard not to!!), but I'm trying to eat well.  This morning was yogurt and a string cheese.  Lunch will be a salad and a sammich.  But for dinner, since Levi is going to be at his nerd day all day long, I've decided to order pizza.  LOL!  A pizza with no sauce, add bacon, to be exact.  Basically, it's like cheese sticks with bacon.  So.  Good.

Other than being hungry, I have no other symptoms.  Per usual.  Hooray!  We have another u/s appointment in a couple of weeks. We went from poppy seed baby to apple seed baby this week.  Hooray!  I'll keep you updated!

!!$#%^&$!!

I keep wavering on whether or not to share some news we recently got, and I figure not a whole lot of people read this blog anyway, so what the hey.  Baby #2 is in the oven!  Please be discreet on FB and other such sites, until we're through the first trimester.

We found out Saturday, August 21.  I had high post ovulation temps for 12 days, and my normal luteal phase is about 12 days, so I took a test in the middle of the afternoon and was happy to see two beautiful pink lines!  After two previous stark white negatives, those two pink lines were day-making.  =)

So anyway, I'm just barely pregnant.  My first appointment was yesterday, and everything looks great.  I asked the sonographer, "It's a boy, right?"  lol...I was 4 weeks 4 days along at that point.  =D  I am thinking due to the timing of intercourse, it may be a boy.  I hope so!

I'm due, according to my LMP, on April 29, 2011.  However, I ovulated on day 18 of my cycle rather than day 14, so I'm thinking May 3 is more like it.  The best part?  My brother in law is graduating high school on May 8, 2011!  My poor in laws, lol.  I'm assuming I'll go a week early, since we will be scheduling a repeat c-section this time around (no judgments, please, I've weighed the risks carefully with my husband and my healthcare provider, and have decided that a VBAC is just not worth the risks), I'll have a little more control over when baby comes rather than laboring for over 30 hours last time around.  I'd really like to keep the little bun in there as close to 40 weeks as possible, but I recall what it's like being 38 weeks pregnant (I went all the way to 41 last time!), so we'll see what the OB thinks the closer we get.  I'll also have 2 under 2 for almost a WHOLE MONTH!  lol  I think I can take it.

So!  In all of my spare time, I've of course been obsessing online over every thing pregnancy related.  Message boards, web sites...all things baby!  I remember that this is exactly how I was last time around, only this time I have time and experience on my side.  =)

Almost time for the tot to get up.  More updates to come!