Balancing Act

I feel like I've been having trouble adjusting.  Not to any one thing in particular...more like, well, to everything.  When you're a teenager, you spend all this time and effort trying to figure out who YOU are.  Then you get married, and you have to figure out who you are in a couple.  You get a job, or in my case, stay home and keep house (a full-time job!), and you incorporate that into who you are as well.  Then you have kids.  You have to figure out how to be all the things you were previously, AND a parent.  I think the hardest part for me is learning to juggle all of these things, and not lose who I am at my core during the whole juggling act.

I should start by saying that I am very blessed.  God has given me so much!  I have a loving husband, a wonderful son whose temperament you'd swear was sent straight from Heaven, and friends and family who love me beyond measure.  We are financially blessed, and never want for anything.  We have a plethora of things to be thankful for, and believe me, I am.

One of the things I need to work on is having time for just me.  During the day, I'm responsible for Oliver all day long.  When he's napping, I'm responsible for taking care of the house.  When Levi gets home, I'm responsible for taking care of him and making sure he has what he needs.  Then I get everything ready to do it all over the next day.  I'm lucky in that if I need to run errands or something on the weekend, Levi is more than happy to take care of the baby.  It's just that grocery shopping isn't exactly ME time, you know?

Levi and I have talked about it, and we thought that one of the solutions was for me to get back into photography.  He thought if I had something to help me decompress, it would help me feel more balanced.  My new camera is on the way (it couldn't get here fast enough!!), and I'm looking forward to jumping back in to taking pictures.  Another solution we came up with was to start having evening Bible studies together after we put the tot down for the night.  That way, we're spending time together AND we're spending time with God in the Word.  It will strengthen our marriage, our spiritual lives, and make us better, well, everything...better spouses, better friends, better people.

I think that the other part of the solution is that I'm going to have to start realizing that I'm not going to get to be all the things I was before, AND the person I am now.  Yes, I need time out for me.  But I don't need to spend so much time on me that I neglect my family.  Or my friends.  Or my walk with God.  Finding the balance is going to be a challenge, but it's one I'm willing to tackle head on.  After all...these are the most important things in my life.  Being a wife, mother, friend, sister, daughter...these are the things that make life worth living.

Here's to the first steps.  Pray that I stay encouraged on this search for balance!